Why Joke At Being Real?

She blew into my life 

Like a sweet summer breeze,

Stole my heart in  instant, 

Made me weak in the knees...

She seemed so sincere 

When she'd look in my eyes

And say the things i've waited 

To hear my whole life.

I thought she was different... 

I thought she was real.

I never thought i could feel 

the way she made me feel.

I just don't understand why 

She wasted the time

When there was nothing 

To gain on her end or mine.

It was perfectly senseless...

Not one reason why.

She would just disappear 

Without saying goodbye.

She had me floating on air, 

then let me crash to the ground.

It's too much to wrap my mind around.

Why joke at being real? 

No one wins in the end.

Someone always gets hurt 

When the other pretends.

Why say all those things 

When you don't mean a word?

It's mean and it's cruel

It's completely absurd.

Now i'm left here to wonder 

What could've gone wrong,

Why just stopped calling,

Why she strung me along?

My thoughts, they consume me, Like a crop consumes rain.

Another sleepless night just Might driven me insane.

I toss and turn over again.

I can't help but feel like 

I've lost my best friend.

But a friend would be honest, Wouldn't play with your heart.

A friend wouldn't lie to you 

Right from the start.

A friend would still be 

There come tomorrow

A friend would comfort, 

Not cause you sorrow.

I wonder 

if...whatever her reasons may be 

That surely she knew 

Her actions would hurt me?

And i wonder if from time to time

The thought of me might cross her mind?

Does she think my "angel" eyes 

Filled with tears because she lied?

Does my memory haunt her in  sleep?

For her it's probably not that deep.

I truly wish her all the best,

Hope she's okay and happiness...

Finds everything she's looking for...

Good health, true love and so much more.

I miss her, and it breaks my heart, 

That it had to end 

before it got to start.

©Marabi Amfaal Hydara

The Humanitarian Poet